There is one thing that is toxic in every area of your life, stands in your way, keeps you feeling stuck, angry and disappointed. This one thing, that runs rampant in all of our lives, is blame.
The tricky thing about blame is that we are so habituated to it. We grow up in environments where blame is the norm, we grow up blaming and being blamed. In this episode I give an example of an everyday situation (in my life) where I immediately resorted to blaming and how toxic and utterly useless it is.
What unfolds in our lives is simply feedback. Instead of funneling our resources into blame, I challenge you take the feedback and adjust. Instead of searching who is to blame, I have a tool called the responsibility reset where “reality + fault = blame”and “reality – fault = responsibility”. Responsibility is taking the problem and looking for a creative solution, putting your energy and resources into service of finding the solution instead of wasting time blaming.
I like to say that life is happening for you, not to you. You are the creator of your reality and if this is the case, then moving away from blame is moving away from the victim position and into a position of power. Until you have healed fully in that situation or area of your life, the universe is going to give you another opportunity to reset, to re-pattern, to change the blueprint. If you can consciously see this as an opportunity, you shift from resistance to acceptance to ease and flow.
It is a process. And I like to say that if it’s not here yet, you’re not there yet. The skill is to learn to see and trust that the journey is one of preparation for your deepest desires. The important thing to remember along the way is that the destination is not the gift. Who you become in the process is really the point, and the thing that stands in the way of your process, is blame.
Banishing blame and taking responsibility is the foundation of what is need to rise to your rightful place of influence and reign in every area of your life.
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